Page 24

2016 Artwork Acolyte! Illustration Teapot

Smiling to yourself, you say: ‘I’ll have sugar please.

Grumbling to himself, Brother Archmalkwith gets to his feet slowly and dodders across the room to a creaking shelf that is lined with jars. He opens one of them and says ‘No, those are buzzard’s gizzards.‘ He opens another one and sniffs it, before saying ‘No, those are desiccated adder bones. The sugar must be here somewhere.

After carefully inspecting several jars of ground bones, deadly poisons and unknown secretions, he finally holds an unmarked jar aloft and says triumphantly: ‘Here it is!

He drops two heaped teaspoons of the white powder into the teacup and hands it to you. A sinking feeling fills the pit of your stomach as you slowly bring the cup to your lips and take a small sip. It tastes like sweet tea.

Honestly, did you really think that it was poisoned? Come on, admit it, you did! Really, you should be ashamed of yourself!

After sullenly and shamefully finishing your tea in silence, you ask Brother Archmalkwith for directions. He grumbles for a few minutes, before scribbling a badly-drawn map on a crumpled piece of paper. He thrusts it into your hands and says: ‘There! Be gone with you!

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