Page 29

2016 Artwork Acolyte! Illustration Teapot

You sit down on the chair, it is surprisingly comfortable. Brother Archmalkwith opens one of the drawers of his desk and pulls out a rusty old kettle. Plonking it onto the desk, he fumbles around until he finds a jug of what you sincerely hope is water.

After he has poured the water into the kettle, he gets to his feet slowly and gestures towards an unmarked tin at the back of the desk. You reach over and hand it to him, he opens it and sniffs it for a few seconds before saying: ‘Acolyte! That is a tin of dried wormwood! Are you trying to kill us both?

Bewildered, you try to stutter an apology. Brother Archmalkwith ignores you, before suddenly slapping his forehead and saying: ‘Oh, silly me!‘ And reaching for another unmarked tin. Before you can get a good look at it’s contents, he has already shovelled several heaped teaspoons of it into the kettle.

Staring intently at the kettle, Brother Archmalkwith mutters a few arcane and ancient words. You hear an ominous rumbling sound and, three seconds later, steam is pouring out of the kettle.

‘Acolyte! I am sure you have many questions, I have but one. Do you want sugar in your tea?

– If you want sugar CLICK HERE

– If you don’t want sugar CLICK HERE

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