Taking a deep breath and trying to steady your trembling hands, you say: ‘I will not sacrifice the goat, because …. because I believe that variety is the spice of life.‘
Indignant grumblings and puzzled mutterings quickly fill the room, until a voice from the darkness shouts: ‘Explain yourself, acolyte!‘
Looking around, your eyes rest on the box of chocolates once again. You pick it up and hold it above your head, before saying: ‘This may be heresy and it may be blasphemy, but this order has been sacrificing goats to our glorious Elder Goddess for many years. I can’t help but think that the Elder Goddess Zuccax might be tired of eating nothing but goat.‘
Gasps of horror fill the room, until High Priestess Lachard steps out from the darkness with a furious scowl on her face: ‘Silence everyone! Very well acolyte, you may sacrifice the chocolates. We shall let the Elder Goddess be your judge! May she strike you down if you are in error!‘
The clock strikes midnight and you raise the dagger above your head. You feel a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach. At the third chime after midnight, you swing the blade downwards into the box of chocolates.
The goat jumps off of the altar in abject terror as your dagger pierces the cellophane and large gouts of strawberry cream and Turkish delight spatter across your robes. An eerie silence fills the room until a low rumbling sound echoes through the air.
In a voice that can only be described as divinely beautiful, the Elder Goddess Zuccax says: ‘Finally! At long last! Some chocolates! Acolyte, you have served me well and as your reward, I anoint you as the leader of my Earthly followers. May this be the beginning of a long and beautiful friendship.‘
You bow and thank the Elder Goddess. High Priestess Lachard is absolutely speechless. Brother Throckmorton cackles quietly to himself.
Finally, you say: ‘As my first act as anointed leader, I decree that we order pizza for the ceremonial feast. And will someone please turn the lights on, I can’t see a bloody thing in here.‘
As the rooms lights flicker on, both the goat and your new followers look up at you eagerly. You’ve done it! You’ve won! You have the blessing of the Elder Goddes Zuccax and a lifetime of power, wealth and ruined boxes of chocolates ahead of you.
The End 🙂 Congratulations, you got the good ending 🙂